Poor English

[crissdee]

Someone on FB selling some toy "dinnasaurs"....

[amanda]

So small enough to eat?

[crissdee]

FB again.

Chester drawers

Chest of draws

storage draws

storage boxs

lourve panel

smart watxh

another chest of draws

and some wieghts

[tetsabb]

Radio Times usually is well-written, correctly punctuated and spelled. To my horror, next week's edition  says that someone went to the sight of the Battle of el Alamein.
Ouch!

[amanda]

Except that it doesn't pick up things like homonyms. There was a similar type of error in my newspaper recently.

[crissdee]

FB again, a "sowing machine". Not a piece of agricultural equipment. Not only did they misspell it THREE times in the ad, it included a picture of the box it came in, whereon it was spelled correctly.....

www.facebook.com/marketplace/item/2263684787339961/

[charliesdragon]

Yeah, "sowing machine" is not how you spell "plastic piece of crap."

After having success with using a hand-cranked Singer sewing machine from 1937, I've developed a distinct dislike for plastic machines, and that one looks about as well constructed as a cheap toy.

[suze]

Alas! I should have given you my late mother-in-law's sewing machine after she died.

She grew up in the north west of England, and her sewing machine was from a north west manufacturer, Jones & Co (Guide Bridge) Limited.  Guide Bridge is a suburb of Manchester which would not have been short of dark Satanic mills in those days, and from that place Mr Jones made what were for a time Britain's best selling sewing machines.

I don't know the precise date of her sewing machine, but it was the only one she ever possessed.  A sewing machine was the sort of thing that a young woman was given upon leaving her parents' home and getting married, so perhaps mid 60s.  By that time, the family Jones had sold out and their sewing machines were made by the Japanese conglomerate Brother - but still at Guide Bridge, where they make sewing machines to this day.  (I knew the name Brother first of all for printers, but it turns out that sewing machines have always been a major part of the business.)

I don't swear that her sewing machine was this precise model which looks older, but it was not unlike this.  Apparently they go for about £300 now - but no member of the family had a use for it, so it was probably thrown away.

[crissdee]

I think I may have mentioned in our previous home that I once found myself in the Westfield shopping centre in Shepherds Bush, and saw one of the stores had decorated their window with a number of such machines, close to a hundred from memory, and I wondered how much they might have been worth as functioning machines, rather than window dressing.

[crissdee]

From a YT comment. I'm guessing that English is not their first language, so I'll cut them some slack, but there's a degree of poetry about their attempt...

"That a good memories but we don’t born in 1982. I wished you can try memories about London Bus Route in East London from the past"

[Bondee]

From a review of a TV series on IMDb...

Ive allready watched it once before and got really hooked halfway threw.

[crissdee]

Another YT comment..

"as everyone just takes enough with what ever was thats what they will make so get used to it!"

I'm sure there's some meaning in that sentence somewhere....

And another one...


"None of these wern't even bigger than my 28" monitor..."

[crissdee]

OK, we have a winner in the "worst written captions" competition....

www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQb6Rljov4Y

[celebaelin]

Jul 18, 2024 16:46:36 GMT suze said:

What is the answer to "elevated step"?

I'm guessing that it's stair.  If so, it's actually quite a difficult word to write a clue for.

Risers and treads.

Cryptic could be fun - how about

Peruvian bear's stern look at hearing.

[jenny]

That would work well for a cryptic crossword, Guardian/Times/Telegraph style, but would fox all the Americans, who really don't do cryptic crosswords.

[efros]

and most wouldn't know a Paddington stare from a poke in the eye... with a blunt stick.

[bigmartin]

One of my fellow NT volunteers a property in E Sussex commented on Facebook about putting a "reef" on a war memorial at their property.

[crissdee]

Tied a rope around it?

[crissdee]

On YT, a story about a guy teaching his 18 month old daughter to talk. Apparently, he was "exited" to do it, and "whenerver" she got something right, he was "extatic".

I hope he didn't teach her to spell...

Different kind of poor English here, just epic sentence construction and/or lack of punctuation;


"When I was in highschool I had a friend who I told my secret crush too and he talked to her and told me she likes me and to ask her out and so I did , she then rejects me and say’s she doesn’t like me at all and I tried to talk to my friend about it but he just stopped talking to me or texting me completely so I thought I did something wrong and he just avoided me and now we’re Adults and we live in different towns so it’s not like we run into each other often . I am so confused as to why he lied and it’s not like we had a grudge or anything we were always cool and always joked about stuff like any friend and he just ups and dips from our friendship to this day I haven’t spoken to him and it’s going on 6 years now and he’s deleted his social media’s and I have no idea what’s he up to now , the guy was my best friend since the 6th grade and after 10th grade he just seemed like he didn’t want to be near me or even talk to me and the girl I liked became more of a friend then my actual friend or at least former friend and it’s so weird I just wish we were still friends man I feel like I offended him somehow or made a joke about him he never forgot when we’d clown on each other or something and I wanna talk to him again"

Two commas and a full stop in all those words....

[amanda]

Nov 9, 2024 9:45:29 GMT efros said:

and most wouldn't know a Paddington stare from a poke in the eye... with a blunt stick.

Some may not even know who Paddington was.

[Bondee]

Nov 9, 2024 15:34:53 GMT crissdee said:

Tied a rope around it?

Or smoked it.

[crissdee]

"You didn't waited 40 minutes for a dinner before haven't you?"

Epic, just.....epic.

[amanda]

FB comment on those escaped monkeys from a lab:

why don't you use all these phediphiles out there instead of innocent animals!

Next comment butchers that word even more.

[charliesdragon]

Nov 3, 2024 13:46:53 GMT suze said:

I don't swear that her sewing machine was this precise model which looks older, but it was not unlike this.

That looks very similar to a Singer 28. I'm not familiar with the model names of other makers, but a lot of Singer's designs were copied or emulated.

The amazing thing about Singers is that they were so numerous I can still get replacement parts for a Singer 28 from 1907 my family has. There's a thriving community of passionate people, some who disassemble machines that are no longer functioning and sell the bits that are still functioning and can be used in other machines.

[eeyoresmum]

I'd love to have the room for a Singer complete with the cast-iron base. They were brilliant. Used my mother's for many years.
Often, those bases are now used as an ornament, to display plants etc.

[amanda]

Last year I went with a neighbour when she bought some raised garden beds and in that garden I saw a sewing machine 'frame' in that style.

[tetsabb]

Talk of sewing machines can not continue without this

sorry!

[crissdee]

Can someone suggest a way of correcting someone who misspells "condescending", without being the thing they hate?

[Bondee]

Post the joke about the dwarf escaping from prison.